Text: Is your house number 4153?

Me: That depends on who this is? Sorry – don’t have your number in my phone.

Jess: It’s Jess. What, don’t you give your address to random strangers?

Me: I used to, but then there was that lawsuit. And the fire. And the penicillin. And the hedge trimmer. And the midget with the nachos.

Jess: Wow.

Me: Needless to say, I don’t give my address out to strangers anymore.

Jess: Please save my number in case you have any more incidents including midgets with nachos.